My Favorite Thing! UPDATE

You know what I love? When people mistake polite and subdued for stupid and gullible and think that means they can rook you with idiocy and shady business practices. Oh wait! Whoops! * smacks forehead* I'm sorry, I don't love that. My bad. I don't love that at all.

H.A.T.E.

So sorry, next time I'll try to remember to be a complete bitch to you so you don't make that terrible mistake again and end up looking like the world's biggest fucking jackass. Fucking assholes.

If only I had the cojones* to say that to the asshole in question.... versus the oh-so confrontational method of writing it in anonymity on a blog no one fucking sees. Sigh. Baby steps? I'm not passive aggressive, just incredibly non-confrontational until pushed to my breaking point. Which, apparently, needs to arrive sooner in these moments.


* On a much happier and completely silly note. I instinctively spelled cojones right instead of using the typical English misspelling of it, and shall now take a brief moment to bask in my own awesomeness.
You may join me. :)

EDITED to add: Oh, ho ho. I'm not letting this one go boys and girls. I tried, but I'm really not a fan of people blatantly trying to rip me off, and expect I'll just shut up about it and quietly go away. Fuck that noise. :)

My sense of justice and fairness (not to mention decent business practices) is yelling at me to do something. My hope is that if I commit to it, I can get back to writing, instead of spending the entire day fuming impotently.

And Then They Shot Me

I may have lied to you gentle readers. Not having a description for your story might not aggravate me as much as having one that doesn't tell me one goddamn thing.

Book Description:
In an ancient age of upheaval, betrayal and misery; in a world torn apart by violence and war, the fate of the world hangs on one small, pretty fucking helpless woman.

Running from a fate worse than death, Destiny McCliche is violated by vicious, sorcery wielding wolf-bears and left to die in the harsh, forbidding shadow of Mount Evildoomsmashcrash.

But Fate has plans for Destiny, cruel plans that don't include her death, just a shit ton of suffering and victimization under the treacherous guise of angry muscles and force-as-romance. Mystifying plans of mysteriousness. Only the Gods know if she'll succeed, or drown the world in darkness everlasting... or do they?

Tina Idon'thaveabookdescriptionforyou lives in Bumblyfuck, Missouri* with her eight dogs, sixteen cats, twelve budgies, a heffalump and two tigers. When not penning her latest masterpiece of aren't-you-sorry-you-didn't-come-up-with-this, NoTelly McFancypants snorts cocaine off the bloated tits of a dead hooker Cletus found in the swamp one time. She also likes to knit.

Jesus fucking christ. I know more about you then I do your goddamn book!!! I can't begin to add enough exclamation points to that last sentence. I would get cast out of the super sekret writers-to-be group if I put as many there as I want to. Lets just say I almost went all Old Yeller up in this shit and had to be taken out back and shot. Tragically. To Very Sad Music.

*Sorry Missourians, but you really need to do something about all those dead hookers out in your swamp.

W. T. F.

If you want me to do you a favor, it probably shouldn’t involve me MISSING MY FINAL FUCKING EXAM OR THE STUDY TIME LEADING UP TO IT. It probably also shouldn’t involve me RUNNING OVER HELL’S HALF FUCKING ACRES FOR SHIT YOU SHOULD BE DOING BECAUSE OF YOUR OWN FUCKING STUPIDITY. For shizzle.

Now, admittedly, I am a sickly, brain-fogged, frighteningly sleep deprived person, but I’m also pretty goddamn sure it’s illegal to FLIP INTO THE LEFT HAND TURNING LANE to make a RIGHT HAND TURN AROUND MY VEHICLE which is STOPPED AT A VERY RED LIGHT. But I am sickly and sleep-deprived so who knows, maybe they have, in fact, changed basic driving laws.

Amazing. I’ve been up for less than two hours and all ready this is what I’ve had to deal with.

Change. They needs it.

I try not to put anything political on this blog, mostly because it's neither the purpose nor function of it.

But the shit going on in Egypt is atrocious. Yea, I'm a writer, but these kinds of injustices tend to leave me a little less than coherent. Also, I get a little frothy at the mouthy, so I'm going to leave it at THIS and THIS, needs to stop. Right the fuck now. Those people are working hard for their change and the fucking military is pissing all over it.

On Room and Board

Never doing it again. Never ever ever ever ever EVER. Never.

I don't care if I have to kill a man or hand deliver him to aliens for vivisection to get the funds necessary to afford living on my own, never doing the room an board thing again.

I'll live with my significant other, or no one at all.

Except a pet. totally doesn't count.